Why is it so quiet?

Thanks Ray.  I wish I could retire now.  We hated to leave today.  Can't wait for Friday!

Well, if no one is going to talk at least maybe you can smile...        Enjoy...

TWENTY EIGHT LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.              

9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10.. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.             
11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

18.. Procrastinate Now!              
19.. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That?

20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.                

22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

24.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.                  
28.. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson.

Rick, Those are great.  I just want you to know that I have a lot going on in my life right now.  I am busy, busy, busy!  Still, I check the forum to see if anyone logs in and leaves a tid bit of wisdom.

I have heard and read the excuse that "I am so busy, I just don't have time" and yet, I found 5 minutes to respond.  I wish more of  our classmates would log on and say SOMETHING!  Sorry, not trying to preach.  I have been going since 6am and this forum is my last stop before bed.

Come on guys and gals say something.  This means you too Dana!

Here's another little something that should hit home with the married me among us.  Ladies, it's just a funny little fictional story so don't get your panties in a wad (if you wear a thong, they're already in a wad I suppose.....

The Sweetness of Married  Life

The newlyweds were only married two weeks, when the husband said to the wife, 'Honey I'm going to Hank's Tavern to have a beer, I'll be right back'.

'Where are you going, Coochy Coo?' asked the wife.

'I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face,' he answered. 'I'm going to have a beer...'

The wife said, 'You want a beer, my love?' She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany , Holland , Japan , India , etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, 'Yes, Lollipop..... But at the bar.... You know....they have frozen glasses......... '

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, 'You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?' She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, 'Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long.. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?'

'You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?' She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little quiches.

'But my sweet honey ...... At the bar... You know there's swearing, dirty words and all that...'

'You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP, CHICKEN SHIT! SIT YOUR SORRY ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES RIGHT HERE BECAUSE YOU'RE FREAKIN' MARRIED NOW AND YOUR SORRY ASS IS NOT GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER! GOT IT, DUMBASS?'

And they lived happily ever after.

Isn't that a sweet story?

MARRIED LIFE ...............
MAKES MY EYES TEAR UP

Oh, my!!  Ricky, you want responses?  Well, here it is:  STOP THAT!!!

Ricky, you are a laugh-and-a-half!  Thanks for the morning chuckle!

Ricky, I knew you were going to wake up Brenda with that one.  You can't escape the forum police.  They are very vigilant.

By the way, was that a Mona and Ricky story from way back when?

Well dang....   Wouldn't you know it.  Brenda hasn't been on in weeks and the moment I post something off-color she's there in an instant.  She must have some kind of software running on her PC that alerts her when certain words are posted.  I'll admit I thought twice about posting it or cleaning it up just a bit, but what the heck. 

And Cyndie, your question about "was that a Mona and Ricky story from way back when?".  That's a Mona and Ricky story from just about every week in some form or fashion.  I'm am so mistreated, abused, and disrespected.  Can I get an amen from the rest of you married guys?

And don't you forget it either!!  I'm watching you, Ricky!!

Since I now know Brenda is watching me,  (by the way, where were you when we had that Layton Fryer guy cursing up a storm?)  I've decided to bring out a more kinder/gentler side of myself.  But don't worry, it won't last long.

Not having any grandchildren yet, I've been thinking about the world they will have to grow up in vs. the one we grew up in.  The day to day differences of just little things.  Here are some of the things I'd like for them to experience in their life.  (Get ready, this is pretty deep)

Dear Grandchildren, 
 

I'd really like for you to know about hand me down clothes and leftover meat loaf sandwiches. I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.   I hope you learn to make your own bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.   And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.   It will be good if at least one time you can see puppies born and your old dog put to sleep.   I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.  I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother/sister.  And it's all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he's scared, I hope you let him.   When you want to see a movie and your little brother/sister wants to tag along, I hope you'll let him/her   I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.   On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope you don't ask your driver to drop you two blocks away so you won't be seen riding with someone as uncool as your Mom.   If you want a slingshot, I hope your Dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.   I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.   When you learn to use computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.   I hope you get teased by your friends when you have your first crush on a boy\girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you  learn what soap tastes like.   May you skin your knee climbing a tree, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.   I don't care if you try a beer once, but I hope you don't like it.  And if a friend offers you drugs or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.   I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your Grandma/Grandpa and go fishing with your Uncle!  May you feel sorrow at a funeral and joy during the holidays.  I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through your neighbor's window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster mold of your hand.   These things I wish for you - tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness. To me, it's the best way to appreciate life.       

I was the first one to throw a fit - remember??!! 

Everyone should possess these qualities:  Patience and Wisdom (see attached).

That is one wise dog....    Must have seen this kind of animal before!!    
Notice the skunk's tail.  A definite "back off" posture.
Great picture.

Just in case you wonder where David Moore is and why he is not logging in, I will be at the deer camp from Thursday Nov. 12--Thursday Nov. 19.  If I get time I will check in on my Iphone.  I know you will miss me!  Especially Dana!

Rick, you took the words right out of my mouth.  We did have a pretty safe world to live in growing up in Malvern.  Do you remember going Trick or Treating?  The gang I went with had a great time walking the streets and claiming our share of candy.  I would not let my children or grandchildren do that today.

At Halloween, I remember going over on McHenry Street where my cousin Kathy Elliott lived.  She, Gail Brandon, my sister (the chaparone), and I along with two or three stragglers would go down McHenry over to E. Sullenberger and all the houses in between.  There are still a few good people in those areas, but for the most part, I wouldn't dare take kids there now - let alone let them go by themselves. 

There is a website that someone showed me a while back where you can pull up a map of different neighborhoods.  It will show you where all the ex-cons live, especially child-molesters.  It was a real eye-opener!!  Frightning!!

That would be:   http://www.familywatchdog.us/Search.asp

A few years back a guy that went to school with us for a while and then moved to Magnet was in there for rape.  Any of you remember David Stewart?  I guess he moved because he disappeared from the website for the Malvern/Magnet Cove area.

Ricky, that's David STUART and he is still in the Malvern area. 
When you check out that site it is amazing at how many and how close some of them are. 
We certainly did grow up in a different era. So different we are starting to sound old talking about 'back when'. 
My friends and I would trick or treat from our house on Highland St. all the way over to Pine Bluff St. and make a circle back around to Highland.  Our parents just waited for us to come back home.  
I wish my grandsons could live in a time like that for at least a little while just to see how much fun it was. Weren't we all lucky.

Kinda off the subject but speaking of sounding old, Dilyn and Carson were amazed to find out a few weeks ago that you can play solitaire without a computer.